What makes you the most attractive girl in the room?

Joyful partyYou’ve probably heard by now about Heidi Montag’s ten hour body and facial renovation.  If you haven’t, you can read about it in just about any tabloid mag.  In November she underwent major plastic surgery.  Ten hours under the knife to correct her chin, ears, eyebrows, already augmented breasts, and a variety of other alleged imperfections .  All together she spent an estimated 30,000 dollars and to be honest, she looks the same to me.

Since this story broke it really made me think about women these days and how obsessed we can be when it comes to our appearance.  In general, we pour a lot of money, time, and energy into our physique.  When was the last time you’ve spent less than 3-4 hours and $200 at a hair salon? And you have to go every six to eight weeks or your hair starts to look unwashed.  But that’s just the standard.  What about those of us that spend thousands of dollars each year on designer clothes, shoes, and handbags?  Or religiously schedule routine botox and collagen injections?  In general the female population in America is really, really focused on looking good.  I’m not judging or saying it’s a bad thing, I freak out myself if I have a bad hair day, but here is one thing I want all women to think about: while we are spending so much time and energy on the outside, what is happening to the inside?  When do we put time and money into making the inside of us as beautiful and interesting?  In the long run, your personality, sense of humor and intelligence is what makes or breaks you as a person.  It is what will stay with you throughout the years.  While your skin will sag, hair will thin, and metabolism will slow, the inside of you can be as attractive at 70 as it was at 30… if you let it.

Pretty faces are a dime a dozen in most towns.  But what is rare is a woman with a wicked sense of humor.  A girl that can beat you at pool.  A lady that is as smart as she is sexy.  I remember being in college and going to a party where someone had broken out a guitar.  A few guys toyed around with it and tried playing a few songs when two girls walked by.  One of them insisted the guys give her friend the guitar, saying she knew how to play.  The friend shook her head and refused at first, but after some coaxing she sat down and began to play.  To say she blew everyone away was an understatement.  This girl could really play.  The guys were awestruck.  Suddenly this chick was the hottest girl in the room.  She only played for five minutes but she was the belle of the ball for the next five hours.

If you are single and ready to settle down, the best piece of advice I can give you is to spend less time trying to compete physically with all the other women in the world, and focus on what makes you different on the inside.  Any man that marries you based on your looks will only trade you for a younger model down the road.  What will keep your relationship strong and solid is mutual respect.  And although most guys can appreciate a nice rack, it’s not enough to sustain the long haul.

Next time you are headed to the mall because you need a new outfit,  check out the Barnes & Noble instead of Dolce & Gabbana. Instead of spending an hour at Nail Love, spend that hour practicing piano.  What sets you apart and makes you different is what makes you the most attractive.  So in between a wax and a tan, make sure you also log some time into making yourself better on the inside.  I guarantee it will pay off a lot more in the long run.

To learn more about Jess and her dating techniques, visit www.jessmccann.com New! As of September 27, 2011 – You can follow me on Twitter @iamJessMcCann

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Posted in Dating Coach, Dating Tips, Dating Website | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

7 Responses to What makes you the most attractive girl in the room?

  1. found your site on del.icio.us today and really liked it.. i bookmarked it and will be back to check it out some more later

  2. Brother James says:

    Agreed. Well Said.

    Personalities go along way. The average girl becomes so much more attractive when she has something going for her other than looks. The girl that can talk about her love for soccer is SO much more attractive than the girl that can only talk her Chanel bag.

    As guys, we want to know that you’re somebody. It’s amazing how ugly a girl can be perceived when we realize that all she has going for her is her looks. We’ll get bored and walk away, or we’ll place you in the physical category and not the relationship category.

    Think of it this way: do you want a relationship based on looks or who you are as a person? Which one do you think is going to last longer?

    Work on what makes you awesome and don’t be afraid to show it.

  3. Bob says:

    A girl who can have a striking conversation about soccer is exremely sexy.

  4. elle says:

    Your article was wonderful. It really struck me and will definitely be something I keep in mind from here on out

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